How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize