Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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