this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
