Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
