I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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