I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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