Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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