why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
