Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
