I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
