He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
