This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I got her a Nickelback box set.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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