woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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