dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
I did not marry a roomba.
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