Sponge bath it is.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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