I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
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