Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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