I will die if light touches me.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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