it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
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