Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
