My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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