Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize