Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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