Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
