Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize