drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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