Three words: puerto rican gang bang
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I'm passing your future prison.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
i believe in u and ur pee
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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