just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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