How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Randomize
