ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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