so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
