You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize