You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
