Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
