I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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