Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
