i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
