I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize