17 year olds will be the death of me.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
