So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
where are you?
Hypothermia
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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