careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
