She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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