It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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