Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
