just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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