I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
