Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
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