i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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