there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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