Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
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Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
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It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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